If you were anxiously awaiting epic Haleakala camping pics, you’ll sadly have to wait another 6+ months as our adventures were cut short due to some asshole driver who made an irresponsible choice and forever change my and my friends lives.
On Sunday 3/1/20 at approximately 8:30am on Hansen Road (Maui) we were driving toward Haleakala excited to start our hiking adventure, when a truck headed in the opposite direction came around the curb at 40+ mph, cut over the median into our lane and hit us head on. I was in the backseat with piles of luggage to my right and remember closing my eyes before impact. I was thrust forward despite my seatbelt and felt my right knee connect with something hard. We all remained conscious through the crash and I remember hearing Gun (front pax) screaming for us to get out of the car in case the engine exploded. Pain was radiating through my knee, but I stumbled out of the car in a daze onto the highway, hobbling onto the grass, just off the road. As I laid in the grass trying to calm my breathing, I remember feeling my heart sink knowing we would not be hiking Haleakala. Everyone was asking if I was alright and the driver of the other vehicle was hysterically saying “He was sorry. It was all his fault. He fell asleep at the wheel...”
I just wanted him to shut up and stop making excuses.
Fire, police, and ambulance arrived and my vitals were checked. I explained about the pain in my knee, they offered to take me to the ER in the ambulance, but all my PT/doctor friends explained that the ambulance wouldn’t be able to treat me and it would just be a very expensive car ride. Instead my friends drove me to Maui Medical where I was admitted through the ER and taken in for x-rays. It was reassuring to have one of my best friends (also a Physical Therapist) by my side, but I was still in utter disbelief this moment was actually happening. The PA that treated me, Scott Smith (who I have no problem naming), was a jerk with terrible bedside manner. He was trying to send me away without even getting an x-ray. I told him I wanted one and sure enough something was wrong. The diagnosis was a partial traumatic MPFL sprain on my right knee. My PT friend was unsure how that was diagnosed without an MRI, but in my head it meant that my life was forever changed. The stability in my right knee, something I always took for granted around my knee braced basketball friends, would never be the same again. I have broken down crying over this thought many times in the last few days. Knowing knee injuries haunt you for life, I rage that the at-fault sleeping driver got away without injuries, but caused so much damage to innocent people who happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.
The whole experience has been very emotional, frustrating, and overwhelming. Everything from trying to figure out who was paying my medical bills, to feeling like my care was rushed, to stressing about how to receive care in once I get back to Oregon, to wondering how the hell I was going to do normal things like drive, lift objects, or DJ gigs. The silver lining has been my friends, coworkers, and family who have come out of the woodwork to make me feel like I’m not alone in my recovery. If you have ever offered me a ride, helped carry something, shared medical advice, or emotionally commiserated with me over the last few days, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. At times these gestures of support feel like the last things keeping me from a table-for-one pity party.
For an INTJ that thrives on plans, independence, and avoiding the unexpected, something like this is the proverbial kitchen sink. My demons functions (Fi/Se) are forced to the surface as I deal with the emotional trauma, but mainly the unprompted mountain of sensory bullshit (insurance claims, doctor visits, attention to my own health) which gives me anxiety just thinking about. I know that life is not fair and that every bad thing that ever happened to me has only made me stronger, but telling myself that repeatedly over the last 3 years is getting old.
Time for the pendulum to change directions.
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